Please, for the love of all that's good in the world...if you're fat at least have some respect for your appearance!!!

Let me explain.

Tuesday I was leaving my EPY class and walked around the corner where I was bombarded with white, billowy flesh falling out of too small of clothes.  This girl was sitting in this chair in incredibly too small of clothes and there was skin everywhere.  Her hair was greasy and unkempt and she smelled that horrendous smell of an unwashed fat person (we all know that smell).  WHY did she choose to be that way???  I've always been incredibly paranoid about my appearance...just because a person is fat doesn't mean that they have to fit the stereotype!  No wonder fatties have a bad rap!

So please...if you're fat you can still take pride in your appearance.  You can still dress in your CORRECT size.  In fact, PLEASE DO!!!  Dressing in smaller sizes only makes the fat rolls more distinct and as in this particular issue...visible to those who do not want to see it!

And for crying out loud...take a shower and use soap!

Sometimes I have so much to say that I can't say it at all.  School's going great.  That's not the problem I'm having these days.  It's more STILL my lack of income.  I just tried applying for unemployment and I'm not eligible.  I've been finding myself more and more stressed out these days as winter rears its ugly head.  Winter means $300/month power bills.  Winter means that try as we might we can't survive on Kurt's income alone anymore.  Winter means that I'm still angry at my mom for telling me to go into the ER because she'd help me pay for it and then reneged on her promise.  Winter means the holidays.  Winter means buying gifts for people with money that I don't have...or looking like a schmuck.  I don't mind being a schmuck...but this will be like the third year that I've looked like one.  Winter means not seeing my niece when she and my sister visit Utah over xmas because I don't have the money to go see them.

Winter means the end of my first semester back in college.  Winter means looking forward to Spring semester starting and new classes to enjoy.  Winter means new photos to take and explore with my camera.  Winter is winter.  It's simply a season.  It's my emotions and thoughts that can make it into either a good thing or a bad thing.

As of now...I choose to make it into a good thing.  Now...if I can just talk my inner critic into believing the same thing.